Hey, I Couldn't Help But Notice How Much You Look Like Everybody Else!

Blog
* Nothing attracts men more than being nondescript! Title is from Mystery Science Theater 3000.

* I blogged every day this month. I deserve a damn reward of some sort. REWARD ME.

Awesome
* This dude duct-taped his plane together to fly home:

[Found at Unique Daily]
THEN HE FLEW IT HOME. He flew home via the power of duct tape and his own mad genius. That is awesome, so long as I do not have to be IN the duct tape plane. I don't think I'd handle that well. I dislike regular planes. WIthout duct tape.

Fandom
* Russell T. Davies and Joss Whedon, the two men who most consistently break my heart via television, are merged into a glorious collaboration of credits:

AND NO ONE DIES, SIRS. YOU SEE HOW NICE IT IS WHEN YOU DON'T DESTROY EVERYTHING GOOD AND PURE? ....I'm sorry. I watched the series finale of Dollhouse. And I just purchased Torchwood: Children of the Earth. These men are NOT on my good side.

Food!Fail
* I love junk food. I do. I think White Castle is the height of fast food, and if it's unhealthy, I will probably be first in line to eat it.
Hand over the french fries, and most of you will live.

But I do not delude myself into thinking fast food is healthy. Of course it's not healthy. That's the POINT. It's like when I went to a baseball game and they listed the calories for every food item. NO ONE on the planet thinks that a deep fried cheese-filled pretzel is good for you. But it is delicious.

Which brings me to Taco Bell. Taco Bell is good, NOT good for you. Taco Bell is delicious and delightful, and I would NEVER in a million years imagine it as being healthful. SO DO NOT TRY, OK?

WHAT? NO. LET MY FAST FOOD BE UNHEALTHY. IF I WANT HEALTHY, I'LL GO ORDER A FREAKING BAKED POTATO AT WENDY'S.
Click here to see a longer commercial, with full-commentary by the ISS. I'm going to go deep fry some butter.

Technology
* I have a slogan for the good folks at iPad: "For that heavy flow.... of information, use an iPad!" (Please don't send Steve Jobs to turn off my computer, I need it).
And the mockery continues, indefinitely:

See more funny videos and funny pictures at CollegeHumor.

How can you NOT? Here's a name: iTab, It makes me think of the soda, but at least I don't immediately think of women's feminine products.

Politics
* I really, really like Jenny Sandford, soon-to-be-ex-wife of Mark 'I Cry When I Get Caught Being A Complete Shithead' Sandford. His wife is a smart, classy woman. She did not stand beside her husband while he spouted a torrential flow of bullshit, and CRIED (I'm sorry, but it cracks me up. You are lying to EVERYONE, and leaving your state, which needs you due to economic FREE-FALL, and you go off to bang your girlfriend, you get caught, and you cry? Dude. At least have the balls to man up.). Jenny Sandford focused instead on her sons', and her own well-being, and refused to be party to her husband's pity parade.

I do not agree with her on many issues (or any, I think), but she is a very smart lady with morals and ethics and a sense of self, and I would be delighted if more women like her joined the political arena. At this point, with the parties so divided and everyone freaking out at the opposite side, I think it would be a nice change to really respect the person you're debating.

PS Her husband is the Nite Owl of American politics. He cries naked in his Basement of Shame.

Daily Hot Guy

[Tom Felton from the Harry Potter series, looking every bit the smug, condescending bastard from high school that you hated so much you totally wanted to make out with him... or was that just me? Smug, condescending bastards are sexy, in an angry way. Admit it.]

Dollhouse
* Look, I'm upset about Dollhouse getting cancelled, too, but this is hardly the time to- Oh, forget it:

[Found at Emails From Crazy People]
Priorities? Anyone? No?

Daily Icon

[Patti Smith, punk rock poet, lover of Robert Mapplethorpe, singer supreme, writer, political activist, and one of my biggest heroes. If Ms. Smith saw what had become of CBGBs, she'd rain down eternal hellfire and damnation on everyone involved. Plus she totally covered a Bruce Springsteen song, and lived in Jersey for a time. SO JERSEY WINS HA.]

Nostalgia!Win
* Remember My So-Called Life? Back before I hated Claire Danes, and back when everyone wanted to lose their virginity to Jordan Catalano? Great show. Anyway, then Claire Danes made me hate her through excessive suck, and Jared Leto stopped bathing, which is something only CERTAIN people can pull off. But lo, a change has come:

[Found at World of Wonder]
His hair may have distinct hints of Twilight sparkle!fail, but you know what? His outfit reminds me of David Bowie, so I am going to pretend Jared Leto is going to play David Bowie in a movie. That's right, I'm starting an internet rumor. Spread the word.

Movie!Fail
* Dear Matt Dillion:

NO.
Love, LV
PS You rocked in To Die For!

Want
* SHELVES FROM THE FUTURE:

[Found at Like Cool]
Well, not from the future, but techno-cool, yes? I'd like them. I shall line them with books by Stephen Hawking (who is, in fact, god). TRUTH.

OK, it's Sunday, it's cold.... yeah. I got nothing.
- LV

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We're Planning On Smacking Them Down Like The Hand Of God.

Blog
* This may be one of the best lines ever uttered on network TV. Title is from Glee, which needs to come back on right now, because I am bereft without it.

Whut?
* My uncle sent me this. I must have done something horrible that I don't remember. Because otherwise, this makes no sense:

WHAT THE HELL? No, you know what? I don't want an explanation. Just leave me alone. BRAIN HURTS.

Words of Win
* If your taser catches people on fire and ENGULFS THEM IN FLAMES, you are doing it wrong:

A man in Western Australia was engulfed in flames when police officers fired a Taser stun gun at him.

I know the dude was sniffing petrol, and that is illegal, but maybe just a warning next time? HELLO?

Moment of Win
* This makes me laugh long and hard, which is why I am doomed to hell for eternity and am generally a terrible person:

see more Epic Fails

Doctor Who
* Dear David Tennant: You are so fabulous and funny and sexy and brilliant that it is a little PAINFUL to think about you:

"You go into a supermarket and your face is on a cake and underpants. And all that's very odd. It's not what you imagine when you go to drama school, that you'll be commemorated in plastic and icing, and cotton."

Here's the full interview, and he's Scottish, you know. I just like reminding people.

Daily Hot Guy(s)

[Zachary Quinto and Chris Pine, AKA Spock and Kirk from Star Trek. You know, the original Spock/Kirk started the movement of slash fanfiction. Truth. I learned that in college. Yes, real college. Why is everyone laughing?]

People I Love
* I hate My Super Sweet Sixteen, and everyone affiliated with it, and the fact that it exists at all. However, Charlie Brooker's comments are so freaking funny that they made me laugh through the bitter, bitter tears of how doomed our people truly are:


Epic!Fail
* THIS WAS NOT A GOOD LIFE CHOICE, CHRIS BROWN:

[Found at Best Week Ever]
DON'T YOU PAY PEOPLE TO TELL YOU NOT TO DO THINGS LIKE THIS? Because I would take that job. First piece of advice? Go sit in a room until everyone has forgotten you. And I'd like my money in cash, please.

Daily Icon

[Xaviera Hollander, as requested by Iconic Icon Millarca. Xaviera is a call girl, madam, damn clever writer, and unapologetic BAMF. She broke taboos, and rocks leopard bikinis.]

Awesome
* This was shown to me by Stina, who is a genius and you should be nice to her out of fear, because she is going to rule the world. I get England. AND Wales. HA. Um, anyway, this is a video about knitting and jumpers. And goat penis:

I think I need to ask her for Scotland now too.

It is very cold out. Everywhere. YES EVERYWHERE.
- LV

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That Was So Easy. I'm Embarrassed For You.

Blog
* There is NO SHAME in being disarmed by Dean Winchester. And.... cue the dirty jokes. Title is from Supernatural.

Girly Want
* I keep wavering on this one. On one hand, it is dumb and uncomfortable and probably hard to move in. On the other hand, I COULD EAT MY CLOTHES:
[Found at Best Week Ever]
See, this is the way to win Dean Winchester's heart. Wear a CHOCOLATE DRESS. And, if that doesn't work, you can eat your OWN CLOTHES. Couture SNACKS. But it's so dumb. But I don't care.


Comics
* Once again, the Comics Curmudgeon finds humor in the vast, unfunny wasteland of Funk Winkerbean. And hideous thigh shapes.

Books
* She Silverstein was a bad-ass motherfucker who wrote some of the funniest, most twisted shit out there, and I love him, and The Giving Tree makes everyone cry. It's a good way to test for Terminators: 'Did you get a little teary The Giving Tree?' 'No?' 'HE'S A ROBOT.' Read here about how Shel Silverstein managed to write for Playboy AND Lafcadio.

Food!Win
* SWEET JESUS' LAYERED CAKE OF RAINBOW DELIGHT:

[Found at This Is Why You're Fat]
THAT THERE IS TEN LAYERS OF SUGARY HEAVEN.

Want
* Now, this is some CLASSY video game action here:

[Found at Nerd Approved]
Pac Man holds your books and eats your TV, and if your guests aren't into video games, you tell them it's post-modern meta-art, and they'll be all impressed! WIN WIN.

Daily Hot Guy

[Jeffrey Dean Morgan, AKA Father Winchester from Supernatural, AKA The Comedian from Watchmen. I've never seen him in a suit before. It's sort of life-changing.]

Daily Icon
* Inspired by my friend and icon in her own right, Millarca, here's a new category, where we honor the women who we want to be when, and if, we ever grow up
[Sophia Loren, who combines classy with sexy with utter fierceness, AND I want those gloves. And that hat.]

[Liza Minnelli, who did this AND Arrested Development, and rocked them both without breaking a sweat.]

[Joan Didion, one of my favorite authors, and a tough old bitch if there ever was one.]

[Katharine Hepburn doesn't have time for your bullshit]

[Dolly Parton, for whom I sat through an episode of Hannah Montana, AND SHE SANG AND IT WAS WORTH IT, GUYS]

And, some Icons In The Making:
[Dita Von Teese]


[Lady Gaga]
Many more will be in this category. If you have suggestions, Email me. But Millarca gets first pick. AND YOU WILL BE GRATEFUL FOR THAT.

OK, stuff to do.
- LV

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Let Me Tell You Something About Crazy People. The Sex Is Unbelievable.

Blog
* There is honestly no comment I can make that wouldn't be dirty. It's not possible. Title is from Castle.

WTF, INTERNET?
* If you've been reading FEAR AND LOATHING, you know it went through a phase where every day there was a new, frightening toilet to behold. Then the lull in toilet mania. All was well. No more singing/Tweeting/massaging toilets.

Unfortunately, nothing lasts forever:

[Found At Best Week Ever]
It's a sink-mirror-mug-toilet! FROM TEH FUTURE. FOR THE ENVIRONMENT. I don't even have the energy to get upset about a toilet that's smarter than my laptop. I don't know. You poo in a toilet. WE'RE BACK TO TALKING ABOUT TOILETS, GUYS. IT'S GROUNDHOG'S DAY.

Girly Want
* Full disclosure: I don't want these shoes, because I already own them, WHUT:

[Found at Topless Robot]
Tallahassee would approve of these shoes. I wear these with my Zombieland hat, I CAN RULE THE WORLD.

Music
* Butch Walker may have saved huge parts of New Jersey with this song. It soothed me on a stressful day:


Words of Win
You know, this really puts my crappy week into perspective:

Man shot, crashes while driving to hospital, charged with DWI

I withdraw my complaints. Being exhausted sort of pales in comparison, yeah?

Daily Hot Guy

[Gareth David-Lloyd, AKA Ianto Jones from Torchwood.... um.... stabbing someone.... WHY DO I FIND THIS ATTRACTIVE? I FROWN UPON REAL-LIFE VIOLENCE, BUT FULLY SUPPORT NOT-TRUE SCIENCE FICTION VIOLENCE. PLUS IT NEVER HAPPENED.

OK, let's get a nice picture without homicide:

See? Isn't he adorable?]

Moment Of Win
* I find these funny. Clearly I am a terrible, terrible person.

see more Epic Fails

UPCOMING: An explanation on why I love Legion so much, a rant about chain store fail, and other stuff. Maybe.
- LV

PS Another short blog, but it's snowing. That is my excuse. IT IS A GOOD ONE.

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Man, These Anti-Piracy Ads Are Getting Really Mean.

Blog
* Pretty soon people will stand behind you and beat you if you download a video. Title is from The IT Crowd.

TeeVee
* Did you watch Human Target last night? it's corny and amazing and Guerrero makes the show everything it could be and more, and his mustache has secret powers, and SIMON TAM FROM FIREFLY WAS ON LAST NIGHT. Fangirl fangasm. Times infinity. It's a really fun show, and I encourage you all to watch it, so you understand my Twitter shrieks of 'HE HAS THE ANTIDOTE UNDER HIS 'STACHE.'

Politics
* I hate to say it, but Scott Brown won the election fair and square, and ran a much better campaign than his competition, Democrat Fail, and frankly I think people complaining about him winning need to look at a good campaign versus a bad campaign (WHO INSULTS FENWAY PARK? WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT? DO YOU KNOW WHERE YOU'RE CAMPAIGING) and concede that he ran a better game. It's that simple.

Political-politics aside, this makes me sort of like him, because it's horrifying and funny and any teenage (or former teenage) girl can understand the profound humiliation we are witnessing:

OK, Scott Brown, you're sort of entertaining.

Girly Want
* Oh. My. God. I am a short girl Five foot even. I am dainty and wee. Perhaps as a result, I enjoy insane big-ass shoes that kick the shit out of everything, such as these, which would make me normal height:

[Found at Shoe Lust]
Look at these gorgeous bastards. They are exquisite. I could kick the crap out of EVERYTHING. I would run around kicking things, and looking badass, and be fierce and tall-ish. SHORT PEOPLE REPRESENT.

Life Lessons

[Found at Indexed]

Movie!Win
* Yes, I will probably see Clash of the Titans at some point, for two very good reasons: Ralph Fiennes and Liam Neeson. In the meantime, here are some pictures of Sam Worthington, AKA Tall Blue Dude from the Sex Hair Movie:

[Found at Collider]
He's pretty, OK? But I prefer the dulcet tones of Liam Neeson and Ralph Fiennes, thank you very much.

Daily Hot Guy

[Patrick Wilson and his wife, and I'm mostly posting this picture because I dearly love a man who can rock a hat, and God DAMN, sir, you can rock that hat hard. Well done.]

Wow
* This hurts my brain. I want this so badly. I would devote my life to solving it:

[Found at Contact Music]
I could solve this puzzle, with copious amounts of caffeine and a REALLY clear social calendar. Maybe.

Tattoo Of Win
* THE PIGGY, IT HAS BEEN INKED:

[Found at Oddee]
There are nine other weird types of tattoos, but if you need me, I'll be staring at the PIGGIES WITH THE SERIOUS INK.

Animals

see more dog and puppy pictures

Seriously, how is it only Wednesday? I need to know how this is possible. This seems like the longest goddamn week in the history of the universe. ARE WE IN A TIME VORTEX? Because if so, I need a doctor. THE Doctor.

I need more coffee.
- LV

Read More »»

Shut Your Noise Tube, Taco Human!

Blog
* What exactly IS a... you know what? I don't want to know. Title is from Invader Zim.

Epic!Fail
* I'm sorry, but it takes cojones grandes to fry chicken after breaking and entering. He's sort of my hero. My jailed hero.

An eastern Pennsylvania man was charged after he allegedly broke into a home, cut his hair and prepared fried chicken before being discovered.

Awesome
* This possibly made my whole week:

[Found at Best Week Ever]
See? It's all a conspiracy. AND AND did you notice it has the October release date at the bottom? WHO RUNS PARAMOUNT? I'm sorry, I'll be quiet now.

Social Networking
* Do you have 200, 300, 400 friends on Facebook? Well, start culling the herd.

But Robin Dunbar, professor of Evolutionary Anthropology at Oxford University, has revealed that human brains are only capable of managing a scant 150 friendships; a number that hasn't changed throughout history, despite our modern fascination with Twitter, blogging and Facebook.

LIES. I remember everyone on my Facebook! Especially.... what? Yeah, this is probably accurate. But Professor Dunbar needs to remember that a large percentage of people who are your friends on Facebook are really 'people I knew in middle school and hated, but they added me and I don't care enough to not add them back.'

Fandom

[Found at Unique Daily]

Daily Hot Guy

[Ian Somerhalder, who is on that show Vampire Diaries and it looks terrible and I will NOT watch it, even though he seems to be evil and snarky and gorgeous.... and pretty.... and mean.... DAMMIT, CW.]

Words of Win

see more Political Pictures

Moment of Win
* HOLY CRAP, NO.

see more Epic Fails

OK, have work early today. Also, Human Target is on tonight. Just like saying that....
- LV

Read More »»

You're Always Saying Pansy Stuff Like That.

Blog
* You do have a habit of saying the 'pansy stuff,' Sam. Truth hurts. Title is from Supernatural.

Girly Shit
* This was not the first thing I needed to see Monday morning:

[Found at Shoe Lust]
I... it's too early. Do I want this shoe? Do I hate this shoe? Are parts of this shoe edible? It's too damn early.

Music
* I have had this song stuck in my head for two days now, and I don't even LIKE Beyonce:

It's starting to drive me insane. Or, more insane.

Movie!Fail
* They're making a Scream 4. I need to know why. Scream 3 sucked so bad it physically hurt. Scream 2 was a fun, stupid sequel, and Scream made me terrified of plate glass windows and phones. Scream 4 will no doubt destroy society, cause California to sink into the ocean, and mark the End Times.

And don't even get me started on An American Werewolf in London redux, because I WILL BREAK THE INTERNET WITH MY ANGER. WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS? DO NOT REMAKE THIS MOVIE.

Comics
* Dear Marvel Smartass:
You rock.
Love, FEAR AND LOATHING

Books
* How awesome is this? It's a letter from Kurt Vonnegut, after he was a POW in Germany. I love and miss Kurt Vonnegut. He was a genius. I want to reread Breakfast of Champions.

Food!Win
* DUDE, THIS IS BIGGER THAN MY HEAD:

[Found at This Is Why You're Fat]

Donkey: You know what else everybody likes? Parfaits. Have you ever met a person, you say, "Let's get some parfait," they say, "Hell no, I don't like no parfait"? Parfaits are delicious.
Shrek: No! You dense, irritating, miniature beast of burden! Ogres are like onions! End of story. Bye-bye. See ya later.

Specifically, is is a cheesecake parfait, but there aren't any funny quotes about that.

Daily Hot Guy

[Chris Barrie, AKA Rimmer from Red Dwarf, very muddy and on the left, shown here in Lara Croft: Tomb Raider, which is either very funny, or very sad, but I will always love him for yelling, 'SMEGHEAD' and kicking Death in the nuts. How could I not?]

Moment Of Win

see more Epic Fails

Words Of Win

[Found at Unique Daily]

Torchwood
* I need this action figure, and I will take NO MOCKERY for this fact:

[Found at Discount Anime Toys]
IT'S IANTO JONES, BITCHES.

People I Love
* NEIL PATRICK HARRIS ON SESAME STREET:

NEIL PATRICK HARRIS ON SESAME STREET. *cue epic arm!flail of JOY*

Seriously, my face HURTS from grinning.

OK, it's a rainy Monday, and frankly it should be spent sleeping and watching bad movies. But some of us have work. LIFE IS HARD.
- LV

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This Must Be What Going Mad Feels Like.

Blog
* Just wait until you hear the song about him, Simon. Title is from Firefly.

Jersey!Fail
* Wow. My state is really going for some sort of Shame Award:

The brand-new, $185 million public high school in New Brunswick will have energy-providing solar panels on the roof, state-of-the-art lighting for its athletic fields and touch-sensitive, internet-connected "Smart Boards" instead of traditional blackboards.

But when it opened last week, it didn’t have a couple of comparatively low-tech necessities — a crosswalk and a stoplight.

Really? We forgot a CROSSWALK? Are the kids supposed to get home by osmosis? Is this the Xavier Institute? Because that would be cool, actually.

Life Lessons
* This may be funny to me solely because my father is a vegan, my mother is a vegetarian, and I am an omnivore who loves bacon and mayonnaise and sushi:

Going green tearing your family apart?
Therapists report a rise in domestic disputes over environmental issues.

Or I could just be mean.

Movie!Win
* So, guys, I saw Legion yesterday with the divine MissBanshee. And it was EVERYTHING I hoped it would be and more. I loved it. It was so bad. Like, amazingly, all-encompassingly bad. I loved it. No, you have to understand, we CHEERED when shit went down. And tattooed killer angels with guns, and Charles S. Dutton, and the kid from Sling Blade, and ZOMG it was life-changing. I adored it. I may buy this movie. I would see it again. It was SO TERRIBLE.

Crazy-Ass Granny was so CRAZY. Full review will follow, with many exclamation points and a very long, serious look at Paul Bettany and his hot (which I never really noticed before, possibly because he was not made of tattoos and violence and EXPLOSIONS. Maybe he should guest star on Human Target? EXPLODING ANGELS?)

PS Yes it got hideous reviews, but these people do not appreciate the batshit insanity, inexplicable plot points, and ANGELS SHOOTING PEOPLE. Plus, did I mention Paul Bettany is a total badass?

Wow
* I can't decide if this is the funniest story of the week, or the most frightening story of the month:

Man Rams Car Into Restaurant, Eats Breakfast

Investigators think Charles Pierce stepped on the gas instead of hitting the brake while trying to park, but instead of panicking and amid all that debris, he calmly got out of the sedan and placed his order.

Who the hell is serving this guy breakfast after he PLOWS through a BUILDING? That is the guy I think we should be worried about. Also old people should generally not drive. They are terrifying behind the wheel. Old is whenever you think driving into a BUILDING is no big deal.

Animals
* THESE GOATS FAINTS:

MY LIFE HAS A PURPOSE NOW. FIND THE FAINTING GOATS.

Tattoo Of Win
* Click here for one of the worst tattoos I have ever seen. And by worst, I mean gross, offensive, and WHO THE HELL GETS THIS BURNED INTO THEIR FLESH? I MEAN, REALLY? WHAT IS GOING THROUGH YOUR MIND? I NEED TO UNDERSTAND THIS.

I suppose it's sort of funny, in a sick way, but mostly if I met someone with this tattoo I'd be really, really uncomfortable.
It's the one at the bottom of the page, by the way. Flying vaginas are almost QUAINT in comparison.

Daily Hot Guy

[Paull Bettany, AKA Michael from Legion. I may have a problem with this movie. It was SO TERRIBLE, but he is so sexy and violent and his tattoos are hot, and I am now determined to do a double-feature one night with this movie and From Dusk 'Till Dawn. Also pizza and beer. Who's in?]

WTF, INTERNET?
* This may be a misplaced article, because it does not make me angry so much as my brain can't really process it, although that may be due to a profound lack of caffeine in my system.
Behold, BREAD SHOES:

[Found at Inventor Spot]
Now, I hate feet, and I love bread, so the idea of feet touching my precious carbohydrates makes me want to RALPH. RALPH, I SAY. I AM NOT PAYING MONEY FOR YOUR GROSS FEET TO TOUCH MY DELICIOUS RYE.

Stay tuned for stuff about stuff, MAYBE!
- LV

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That's The Worst Goodbye I've Ever Heard. & You Stole It From A Movie.

Blog
* But it's Tallahassee, god dammit! That makes it all OK, right? RIGHT? Title is from Zombieland.

Moment Of Win
* This actually makes me very sad:

see more Epic Fails
But it does say an AWFUL LOT about the universe, does it not?

Doctor Who
* The only thing missing from this insanely gorgeous drawing is Ianto Jones.

Dr Who II by *J-Redd on deviantART
But A) He's technically just from Torchwood, and
B) That much goodness might kill me. I WANT THIS.
There is tons more goodness here at Redd Life Art Works. Make him draw Harley Quinn, OK?

Fandom
* All I can say about this article is: CAPTAIN KIRK SHOULD HAVE BEEN ON DOLLHOUSE. Just the idea blows my mind. MY MIND IS BLOWN. Can you imagine him trading barbs with Alpha Wash? I just want this in my life. Really, for the rest of my life, Echo will be referred to as 'Not-Kirk.'

Daily Hot Guy

[Jensen Ackles, AKA Dean Winchester from Supernatural, AKA Why Is This Dude Not Living In New Jersey, Where We Have The Ghosts And Demons And Also Many Diners? He's a hottie.

People I Love
* Ariana Osborne, colleague of Mr. Warren Ellis, writes a brilliant, wise, and funny piece on blogging, and what it does, and why we do it. I do it because I have a lot of nothing to say. END OF ANALYSIS.

Zombies
* I will continue to post this picture because A) It is brilliant, B) I HAZ A ZOMBIE-HUNTING HAT AND MACHETE IN IT, and B) Zombieland is not out yet on DVD.

Merry Christmas Elle by ~darkravenkiki on deviantART

Epic!Fail
* WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH EVERYONE?

More than 200,000 Swedes joined a Facebook group claiming to be collecting donations to help earthquake victims in Haiti before it was revealed as a hoax by the “Swedish Necrophilia Association”.

Dude, I like a good (bad) joke as much as the next girl. Probably more. I enjoy some pretty twisted humor. But this is NOT funny, it's not clever, it's fucked up and stupid.

If you want to make bad jokes about the pain and suffering of others, I can't stop you. That is your right. If you want to be a brutally insensitive person, have at it. But DON'T screw around with people actually trying to get involved and help those in need. THAT is my issue. If you want to make tasteless, hurtful jokes about people DYING, go for it. But do NOT do something that will discourage people from donating needed money to a cause. OK???

Awesome
* Am I the only girl who would be totally charmed if my boyfriend took me to White Castle for Valentine's Day? My favorite Valentine's Day date is STILL when my then-boyfriend took me to a horror movie, then out for my favorite French toast. Am I a cheap date? Maybe, but I think Valentine's Day should be more about having fun and doing things that will make each other happy, then spending shitloads of money.

Plus, I am from New Jersey, and I love White Castle. If a guy rented a limo to take me there, and made reservations, I would be THOROUGHLY happy. Just saying.

Today I see Legion. LIFE IS GOOD.

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All Facts Start As Dreams Dreamt By A Wizard.

Blog
* Actually, that explains an awful lot. About everything. Title is from Mr. Show with Bob & David.

I haven't done a check-in with my friends and how they're making the internet awesome lately, have I? Let's do that, shall we?

FollowFriday
* MissBanshee, hero of Dirty Jersey, 1/3 of my 'sisters from another mister,' actually talks to crazy people. No, like really crazy. The insane homeless love her ALMOST AS MUCH AS I DO, and she will one day use her army of crazy homeless to defeat the Jersey Shore Menace. Follow her on Twitter here.

* Laroux74 is one of my oldest friends, ANOTHER 1/3 of 'sisters from another mister,' and she is a musical GODDESS, and she knows more about cool shit than you do, AND she has no patience for bullshit bartenders, and if she loves you, you live forever. TRUFAX. Follow her on Twitter here.

* Millarca is most strange and extraordinary. She is all fabulosity and fierceness, and if she runs for President of the Universe, I will vote for her, and the world will be a better place, and there will be more tattoos and glitter and animals, and secks0rs and KNITTING. Also, Ianto would be OK. Follow her on Twitter here.

* Dances With Elvis with either A) fuck you up for being a fool, or b) Fill your life with science and art and EPIC AWESOME. It depends on how dumb you are. And how much caffeine she's had. Follow her on Twitter here.

* When Stina takes over the world by force, cleverness, and her wicked comprehension of technology, stupid people will be banned, so you'd better be freaking nice to her now. Also, she will tell the world scary stories over her intercom that covers the planet, and it will be great. But Peeps will be executed. Follow her on Twitter here.

Help For Haiti
* Ambrosia and Bliss continues their selling of all things pretty, and for every item sold, $10.00 gets donated to the American Red Cross:

Does this yarn make anyone else feel calm, and sort of like listening to Jefferson Airplane? Just me? All right, then.

* Yberry is donating 25% of all sales to Doctors Without Borders, AND her shipping is free, and really, she may be a Yarn Fairy:

Come on, magic is TOTALLY involved in this process.

* Not to be outdone, UglyShmugly is donating 100% of her January sales to Haiti. These rowmarkers will make your knitting feel PRETTY:

My knitting needs to feel pretty. JUST SAYING.

* Knot My Day Job lets you give 25% of your sale to Doctors Without Borders, WHILE BUYING spindles. And yarn.

I need to learn how to use a spindle. Without destroying the planet. You laugh because you underestimate my skills of clumsiness.

Words Of Win

[Found at Friggin Random]

Food!Win
* HAS ANYONE EVER EATEN THIS?

[Found at CakeSpy]
OK, I will calm down. This is a St. Louis Gooey Butter cake. It is made with yellow cake mix, butter, eggs, sugar, AND THE GROUND UP WINGS OF FAIRIES. Sorry, but look at it! I want to nom it with my coffee. MAKE THIS HAPPEN. Has anyone eaten this? Was it everything I like to imagine?

Want
* This is a great way to use your old cassettes, especially if you're like me and simply cannot throw out old media because part of you believes that when the zombie apocalypse comes, only old-school things will work. Ahem. This is a cassette tape closet:

[Found at Incredible Things]
Of course, this becomes much less impressive if you have lame cassettes. Like, if you have everything Yanni has ever done on cassette, maybe you keep your cassette tape closet in the basement. Or the attic. Away from mocking eyes.

Daily Hot Guy

[Seth MacFarlane, who I must repeat, AD NAUSEAM, is probably a hideous bastard, and I don't even WATCH half the shit he does, but his voice is EAR SEX, and he is so smug I can't help but be sort of charmed (attracted), AND he hangs out with Seth Green, which means he's a good person. IT'S A FACT.]
Oh, and this video of Seth MacFarlane doing Family Guy voices is amazing. Really. Yeah, voice pron is VITAL to true love.

Whut?
* So.... poo helps you learn?

[Found at Nerd Approved]
I... it's poo. What does it teach me? That dinosaurs used to poo? That dinosaurs are AWESOME and maybe I should just go buy a copy of Jurassic Park on DVD, because no one's life is complete without it? That poo is funny no matter HOW old you are? That poo can be fossilized, and millions of years from now may be all that's left of you? That even at 24, and a Responsible Adult, your faithful blogger still wants a pet raptor to ride around on and maybe eat people who anger her?

Wow. I did learn a lot.

Movie!Win
* I want to see this movie soooo badly, and I apologize for NOTHING:

Angels with guns. And tattoos. And they blow shit up. I'm not kidding, I will go see this myself.
And yeah, Paul Bettany is hot and British. Not that I notice such things.

May your Friday be pleasant and uneventful. Or filled with hot British angels sworn to protect you from the apocalypse.
- LV

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